I was visiting le swissmiss‘ blog and ran into this post. OMG! I should share before you read that whomever this person is, is a genius! I don’t know why I myself didn’t think of it before. See, I have OCD, and there are rituals that I must do [especially with food] in order to feel like the world is in order. Does that make sense? Anyway, whenever I eat gummy bears, I must eat pairs of same color bears. Or, with Reeses Pieces I must eat two of the same color too. Well, mainly I need to eat in pairs. But with M&M’s, I do the same thing as this man [woman?]. I take two and have a duel between them. I’ve never sent them out, and no one ever notices, because I’m nuts as it is. hahaha… anyway read and enjoy…

Whenever I get a package of plain M&Ms, I make it my duty to continue the strength and robustness of the candy as a species. To this end, I hold M&M duels.

Taking two candies between my thumb and forefinger, I apply pressure, squeezing them together until one of them cracks and splinters. That is the “loser,” and I eat the inferior one immediately. The winner gets to go another round.

I have found that, in general, the brown and red M&Ms are tougher, and the newer blue ones are genetically inferior. I have hypothesized that the blue M&Ms as a race cannot survive long in the intense theater of competition that is the modern candy and snack-food world.

Occasionally I will get a mutation, a candy that is misshapen, or pointier, or flatter than the rest. Almost invariably this proves to be a weakness, but on very rare occasions it gives the candy extra strength. In this way, the species continues to adapt to its environment.

When I reach the end of the pack, I am left with one M&M, the strongest of the herd. Since it would make no sense to eat this one as well, I pack it neatly in an envelope and send it to M&M Mars, A Division of Mars, Inc., Hackettstown, NJ 17840-1503 U.S.A., along with a 3×5 card reading, “Please use this M&M for breeding purposes.”

This week they wrote back to thank me, and sent me a coupon for a free 1/2 pound bag of plain M&Ms. I consider this “grant money.” I have set aside the weekend for a grand tournament. From a field of hundreds, we will discover the True Champion.

There can be only one.

Souces| [kitsunenoir] & [craigslist]